The Science Behind Putting Your Butt in a Bowl of Rice Pudding

rice pudding butt

Rice pudding has had an interesting journey throughout the entire world. As a universal dessert, it’s been served in every corner of the globe from the Middle East to Asia to North America and finally, in bowls for people to stick their butt in.

It’s no surprise that sticking your butt in a bowl of rice pudding can be one of the most satisfying ways to pass time. The soothing relief of viscous rice pudding as you slowly submerge your ass into it, feeling the pudding surround your cheeks, is pure comfort on a level that many have had a difficult time articulating. So, what exactly is the science behind putting your butt in a bowl of rice pudding? We asked renowned physician Dr. Gloria Blueberry for her thoughts:

“To stick your butt in a bowl of rice pudding, quite literally, is to ease your buttocks into a large mixing bowl, or any bowl that suits the size of your tush, that is filled with rice pudding.

“Once the butt is in the rice pudding, a cooling sensation initiates a sense of relief. The custard-like texture of the pudding blankets even the most coarse butts, occasionally finding its way between the cheeks…”

She continues:

“The rice pudding may or may not contain raisins. It’s honestly a personal preference of the butt owner. Once the butt is in the rice pudding, a cooling sensation initiates a sense of relief. The custard-like texture of the pudding blankets even the most coarse butts, occasionally finding its way between the cheeks, into the butt’s crevice, and close to the rectum. In no way is this for sexual gratification, although some will admit that erogenous senses are triggered during the activity.

Dr. Blueberry goes on:

“The rice pudding may, in fact, begin to ooze into the rectum, co-mingling with fecal matter and unintentionally massaging the colon. The butt-owner may begin to ask questions about themselves. The psychological effects of this exercise will take shape. They may wonder why they did this, or what the reasons are they enjoy this, but the scientific research shows that it’s impossible not to enjoy provided the user is fully aware they are sitting in a bowl of rice pudding and they chose to do this.”

 

What are your thoughts on sticking your butt in a bowl of rice pudding? Tell us about it!

 

About NOSHKONG

A food blog. Kinda.

1 Response

  1. Morris Stegosaurus

    It’s a common practice among certain circles I’m aware of to put oatmeal in their underwear, for the sensory experience. No one I’m aware of has done this with rice pudding, but I imagine it would be a similar, and similarly rewarding, experience.

    Liked by 1 person

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