Restaurant Spotlight: Vomir la Langue

Canadian-fusion Takes Centerstage

What do you think of when you hear “Canadian fusion”? If you said maple-injected meat soup bao…you’d be correct. Welcome to Vomir la Langue, Chef Deandra Shirt’s new 24-seat restaurant in the Air Hockey District of the city.

“Vomir la Langue was a passion of mine from the start. The menu is an artfully curated selection of Canadian cuisine, and how it might be influenced from other cultures. The dishes are eclectic and apologetic, like Canada,” wrote Chef Shirt on a Reddit post in the sub-group r/FartRippingChefs

On the menu are dishes that reflect Canadian cuisine, or what an American imagines Canadian food to be.

There’s a lightly battered and fried chicken cutlet, crammed into a baked potato, with plops of foie gras dropped on top for no reason other than to convince you this should be happening.

There is also a poutine omelet which is the classic french fries with cheese curds and gravy, but scrambled with eggs and served by a mountie on a horse who insists you finish it in front of him, otherwise you will be bonked with a steel baton in the knees.

Further down the menu becomes a little more interesting. For example, you can order what’s called the “Universal Health Care”, which is a sixer of Labatt’s Blue with leftover Chinese food. Or, for parties of 11 or more, there is the “Prime Minister”, which is a moose you can all take turns tickling while you eat baskets of hot wings.

While Chef Shirt’s efforts to raise awareness of Canadian-fusion cuisine may fall flat on diners, one thing is for sure: we ordered a pizza when we got home. I mean, we Googled “Vomir la Langue” and it translates to “vomit tongue”. We don’t even know if Chef Shirt is real or an alias for someone with a weird and fucked up vendetta. Maybe we’ll do a follow-up spotlight when we figure this out. For now, we’re in bed with stomach cramps.

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